Have u ever wake up in the morning n not tryin to remember wad what was the dream about… N instead, u keep thinking about ur job… Is that what you really wanna do for the rest of ur life…? What if it doesnt work out like u hoped it will..?? What if that job wasnt meant for u..?? What if u have butterflies in ur stomach everytime u have to do something for ur job, but u dont like doing it…?? If you dont do it, what will happen to you…?? What do you realli wanna do in life..??
Too many?? Thats just part of what i think about everyday after i wake up, n before i fall asleep… My job isnt that hard… But what my makcik say is true… It depends on others more than it depends on me.. N so far, things look cloudy to me… A storm may also come.. Haiz.. I kept motivating myself to do it.. Just do it.. Who noes, ur luck might change… Just do what i have to.. If others can, so can you.. But then, the qns frm before will come again… The onli time i dun think of it is when im praying.. What am i gonna do with my life.. Please god, show me the way… Help me thru these tough n troubling times.. I dun think i can take much more of this uncertainty in my life.. I dun wanna wake up everyday thinking tt i may regret the path ive choosen…
Its really hard trying to be positive about all this.. I wanna be happy go lucky again… No worries… N i nid to find new happiness in my life… It feels so, empty… There’s nothing to look forward to… Nothing to realli make me smile… nothing interesting… No spark.. Maybe all this is because im single…?? But am i really ready for love now…?? With no money, with a job that im not really gd or confident in…. I Need help lah.. My life is gg downhill..
I remember those times in NS… When i thought that i have 2yrs to serve n den go off… I wish it didnt end now.. It was so much better den how i m now… Didnt have to worry, i just repair trucks n my job is done… Go back home n enjoy… Haiz… Those were the times lah… In secondary was even better… Onli had to study, which of coz i didnt do much of.. Asek klua ngan members je… Gi maen bola, maen pool, relax…
Maybe this is the real world n im having a taste of it… It really sux… I hope God will give me the strength n courage to tide over these difficult times… Please tell me what am i supposed to do…
